How Did I Get Here?

"How did I get here?"


Do you ever step back from your life and wonder that to yourself?


Here is the super-short version of how we got here, to become The Simpson Six:


Well, once upon a springtime, a 19-year-old-hippie-college-guy passed a 21-year-old-wide-eyed-and-in-her-own-world-college-gal in the middle of the street and he crossed his eyes at her. She went back to her girlfriends and informed them that Jason Simpson was going to be her new best friend. We attended a small college...so even if you didn't *know* someone, you at least knew who they were--especially if he had hair past his shoulders and never wore shoes.


Then a few weeks later they happened to be diving into the same rock quarry one afternoon after classes with some mutual friends and she caught him staring at her (and he probably caught her staring back). Well, let's fast forward about 4 months to the end of the summer when "Boy Who Does Strange Things With His Eyes" and "Miss Stephanie" finally, officially met...and were instantly inseparable...and so began the start of life as we know it.


Some things are easier than others to pinpoint exactly how you got to where you are now.


What about how you got to the city where you live? Can you pinpoint the moment that led you to the place that you call home? What about the neighborhood (or not) where you live and the house or apartment where you reside?

What about the car that you drive? Or did you make a conscious decision not to own a car? How did you get there?


What form of exercise to you enjoy? Do you enjoy exercise? How did you land on the level of activity that you currently practice?


What is your occupation? Do you have an occupation? Is it by choice or by chance that you are in this role or not at this time? Is this occupation a long-term career that you plan to remain in? For how long? Is it a short-term job that is right for right now? Are you living your dream?


How did I get here?


What foods do you choose to consume? Do you know why you choose to purchase the foods that you eat when you visit the grocery store each week? Do you visit the grocery store each week? How did you learn to cook what you eat, or when did you decide that you were not going to cook your own meals?


If you practice a religion or call a faith your own, how did you get there? Do you know why you believe and do not believe that which you do? What led you to those decisions?


We are the sum of our experiences, but can we always recall what experiences have shaped us to be who we are today? 


How did I get here?


Do you live your life with a purpose in mind and can you point to the markers along the way that have led you to where you are today? If you look back, can you see the answer to "How did I get here?"


More importantly, do you like where you are? Life is not a game of chance. Live intentionally. 


When you look for the answer to "How did I get here?", may you have a smile in your heart as you recall the moments in which you made the little decisions that pointed you in the direction of living the life that you want to live. Even if it's as seemingly insignificant as crossing your eyes at the cute girl in the middle of the street, or smiling back at the barefoot hippie crossing his eyes at you, may you always find the answer to "How did I get here?".

Christmas Cards, Revisited

So we finally got our Christmas cards in the mail this week. After completing that venture, I wanted to come back to say just how thrilled we are with Tiny Prints, both with the quality of their work and the service that they provided!

Their site offered very fast turn-around on our custom cards. From submitting our order until they were in our hands with standard shipping was barely a week--including the Thanksgiving holiday! They communicated every step of the way with where our order was at in the process--and with fast-turn-around, that meant we received updates 2-3 times in one day while it moved through their offices. Most importantly to us was that they followed our special instructions with formatting and printing exactly as requested. We've definitely found a new go-to shop for our family's custom printing!

And if they can make this motley crew look good, that's an added bonus!

Decorating with snow

So as my wife so ecstatically put it earlier this evening, "It looks like Buddy the Elf has visited our house!"  For those of you that don't know who that is (and by now I will admit I am a bit surprised at your obliviousness), Buddy is the character that Will Ferrell played in the movie, Elf.


This evening, we opened door number four from our advent house (follow the link to read about it).  The slip of paper instructed us to decorate the doors of our home.  We pulled out ribbons, bows, wrapping paper, tape and scissors.  The safety kind that are made for the kids to use. To cut paper.  Responsibly.  Under adult supervision.  


Anyways, the kids then set out to decorate anything less than 4 feet high.  They had to come to me to get tape to hang things, so I was able to (constantly) guide them towards the door that we were currently decorating.  Moving swiftly from bag of bows and ribbon to dad for tape to each door throughout the house, the kids soon had each door sparkling  and rattling with ribbons and bows with Stephanie following behind to re-stick items that were falling off from being too hastily hung.  


Then came out the paper.  As a side note, we both admit that we have pack rat tendencies, and this holds true for wrapping paper.  We have a box filled with previously used paper, sometimes four or five times, that we will reuse as many times as we can for smaller and smaller gifts.  This is made possible by our meticulous opening of gifts to preserve the wrapping.  The kids just shred stuff.  They have more fun, hands down.  So, culling from this resource, I procured some remnants for the children to cut up or fold to their liking for decorating purposes.  They mostly stuck rectangle-esque pieces to the doors to represent presents.  I was able to fold some pieces for a more three dimensional representation.  


Then we pulled out some white paper and sat the kids down at the table to start creating our snow flakes.  The original intent was to make a few for each person, but I sort of brought over a large stack of paper (no short supply, see pack rat tendencies), so we just went at it until the paper ran out.  After a quick tutorial on how to fold and cut the paper, and seeing the results, the kids were off in a flurry of paper scraps and cutting sounds.  I had a hard time keeping up with them both in having paper ready and making my own snowflakes.  Meanwhile the sparkle in my wife's eye just got brighter and brighter the more flakes we cut.  I did not realize the decorating plans that she had in her mind, and that it was growing with each flake that we cut out. 


I will admit, I thought that this had the potential to be a 20 minute activity and that the kids would probably throw a few things on two doors and then get distracted.  What happened was almost 2 hours of paper shredding fun.  Yes, we made a big mess, but did we ever have fun doing it.


These are the Christmas memories I want to make.  Thanks kids!

Caroline working on their bedroom door. 

Ian hanging wrapping paper up.

Stephanie demonstrates how to fold the paper for snowflakes.

Eliza had fun playing with all of the scraps and watching.

The aftermath.  Peekaboo, Lydia.

The fruits of our labor.  They are strung all around the house.

Advent: What are you doing while you wait?

Admittedly, I'm a bit of a purest when it comes to celebrating the Christmas season. I'm outspoken in my stance of not being a fan of Winter and choose to cling to Autumn for as long as it is around--to the bitter end of November.


However, December 1st is upon us, and with that, our family joyously ushers in the Advent season and throws open the door widely to celebrate this time of waiting in anticipation of Christmas. Waiting is a life lesson that I am still learning into my 30's, and I expect that I always will be in that process. But when you are little, waiting is a challenge of near impossibility--especially if what you are waiting for is Christmas! For our family, this means a day full of special meals, a few small gifts to open, a crackling fire in the fireplace and a day spent together at home with our little family and no agenda--and the arrival of Baby Jesus to our Nativities.


That's a lot to look forward to. And that's exactly why we celebrate the Advent season of waiting by celebrating each day in December leading up to Christmas in a special way, making each day exciting as we wait and count down to Christmas.


A few years ago I picked up a small wooden house to serve as our family's Advent calendar and each day from December 1-25 we open a door and find an Advent activity for the day.

The list of activities that we have planned for this year are as follows. They are in no particular order, and subject to change. As much as I plan ahead, I am also a last-minute kind of gal--so if something comes up that sounds fun, it may be added to the list as well!

• Make Christmas Countdown chain
• Decorate the doors inside our home
• Visit Celebration Crossing at Indiana State Museum

Caroline and Ian ride the LS Ayres train at Celebration Crossing.

• Go to Christmas at the Zoo
• Visit Jolly Days at the Indianapolis Children’s Museum

Ice Fishing at Jolly Days at the Children's Museum

• Go see the Gingerbread Village and Christmas events at Conner Prairie
• See Jingle Rails at the Eiteljorg Museum
• Visit a live Nativity (we like the one put on at Epworth United Methodist Church)
• Bake and Decorate Christmas cookies (this takes more than one day!)
• Deliver cookies to our neighbors
• Go see the Christmas lights at Reynold’s Farm Equipment
• Attend Ian’s preschool Christmas program
• Pack Spread Some Cheer boxes for Crosspoint
• Make a gingerbread village

Ian works on his Gingerbread house last year.

• Make ornaments for our Christmas tree
• Make a Christmas gift for grandparents
• Mail and ship Christmas cards/packages
• Make and wrap gifts for teachers
• Attend a Christmas Eve service at Crosspoint
• Watch a Christmas movie
• Read a Christmas book
• Read the Christmas story from Luke Chapter 2
• Color Christmas pictures
• Visit the Gingerbread Bazaar at Heritage
• Go Christmas caroling at a local nursing home

Another great source for more Advent activities is the Family Fun website. Also, you likely have unique holiday activities and events in your area that can be included as part of your Advent celebration.

This year we are also adding in a scripture reading each day that goes along with the Jesse Tree idea of tying all of scripture together, leading up to the birth of Christ. While I don't plan to go all out with a tree and elaborate ornaments this year, I appreciate tying the Bible stories that our children are learning together in a meaningful way. And knowing myself and my kids, we'll probably make a little tree and create our own ornaments as we go.

The season of Advent is upon us. What will you be doing while you wait?

Try something new (again)

Thanksgiving was a fun long weekend.  My partner and I packed up the chitlins and headed over the river and through the woods to her mother's house.  We not only had the pleasure of hanging out with her mother, but also Wes and Retha, Steph's brother and sister in law.  Some cameos were made by my parents and various aunts, uncles and cousins as well.  Lot's of food, stories, memories and experiences were shared.  Realistically, it was the embodiment of a holiday with family.


A little back story.  My kids, as cute and brave as they are, really don't like dogs. There are other animals that fall into this category, but for this example, I will be using dogs.  When I say they don't like them, I am not speaking of 'they are of the devil and must repent' type of dislike, but rather they appreciate the animal from a distance.  My kids love to pretend and role play as animals, but when it comes to the real deal, they shy away.


Steph and I have speculated how this dislike has come into being.  Our biggest suspicion is the cat that we used to have.  Once Ian started to move around on his own, said cat would essentially terrorize him.  And Lydia.  It is from this that we believe the skittishness around animals came into being.  


So, for all of those nice summer days of playing in the front yard or heading to the farmers market, each time a dog would pass us by, my children would scurry away and hide behind their parents.  I have tried to break them of this by showing that the animals are kind, letting the owner reassure the kids and just trying to get them more relaxed.  It is a cyclical thing, the kids are anxious, which makes the animal anxious, which makes the kids more anxious...you get the pattern.


So back to this weekend.  Wes and Retha have a pug named Bear.  Cousin Bear if you asked Wes, Retha or my kids.  Yes, Bear is spoiled, but she is so cute!  See...

The mighty Bear! (photo curtesy of Wes Highley)

I went into the weekend with the knowledge that Bear was going to be at the house.  I knew that for the most part, she would stay down stairs in the basement, mostly to keep her hair confined to that space and not the rest of the house.  I also knew that Wes REALLY wanted the kids to play with Bear, mostly to see how Bear would handle interacting with young children.  So begins the social experiment.

Wes had three days to accomplish things.  He needed to start easy, but move quickly if he was going to have the kids and the dog interacting with each other.  Long story short, it was a success.  By the end of the weekend, my kids wanted to go see the dog, to play with her and to pet her.  Now, it wasn't a sweeping 'we want to frolic with a dog all of the time'; Lydia would go down, but still kept her distance when Bear was out on a leash.

I am hoping that through this experience my kids are at least more relaxed around other animals if not a bit more willing to interact with them.  I attribute the change in my kids to a comfortable and friendly environment, trusted family around and a fairly easygoing dog.  I really enjoyed seeing their faces light up instead of cringing in fear and anxiety.  Thanks Bear! (and Wes and Retha).  

Lesson learned:  Even if you don't like something, even if you feel that it is not worth taking another go at, try again.  My kids didn't like dogs getting close to them, and now they are willing to pet at least one.  It may not be an old dog and new tricks situation, but it can be a new experience.

Here is a video of them giving treats to Bear.  (My apologies about the audio, I need to learn how to hold the iPhone correctly)

For the record: I still am not going to eat a banana, for those of you wondering.

A fun day with a pirate and some frogs

This past Sunday was Ian's third birthday.  My wife wrote down her thoughts on the past three years with this guy.

Ian opening his gifts.

So Sunday brought us a nice day to celebrate with the guy.  We started off the day heading to church, where he got to move up to a different class.  He now joins Lydia in the 3-5 year old class, which he was very excited about.  I think the grin on his face afterward showed how much fun he had.  After church we came home to have a nice family lunch, followed by presents and cupcakes!  Both are very exciting, for me and for the kids.  He got several fun new items, but one of his favorite is his pirate hat.  Ian enjoys playing dress up with the girls, but pretty much all that we have is some princess items.  We do have a cowboy/sheriffs outfit, but he enjoys trekking around in the princess slippers a bit much.  He then proceeded to wear the hat for the rest of the day.

The pirate hat.

Ian staring at some frogs.

We went to the Children's Museum to have fun for the day.  They had a frog exhibit still going on, and that was the first place that Ian wanted to go. I really enjoy the traveling exhibits at the Children's Museum.  They provide something different each time, but also it is just a large space for the kids to explore.  Granted that on the busy days it can be unnerving trying to keep track of three kids that want to go in three different directions, but Sunday was not bad (and there were two parents).  So we enjoyed getting to see many live species of frogs, watching some videos and getting to dress up as a frog and hop from lily pad to lily pad.

Frog.

After touring the frogs, we asked Ian what he wanted to do next.  I loved the saucer eyes and excitement that followed.  What He wanted to do?  This never happens! He decided to go to the carousel for a ride on a lion, followed by some play time at the tree house and ice cream shop.  He then chose to head to playscape for some time in the water, sand and construction areas.  I love this kid.

It's fun to get out and play with your kids.  It's a lot of fun to treat them as the VIP for a day.  You both end up getting a lot out of the experience.

Happy Birthday Ian!

Ian is Three!

A rare moment of quiet with our baby Ian--barely a week old.

Our little boy, Ian Alan--holding his own in a house full of sisters--turns 3 today!


Isn't he precious when he's sleeping?


Ian was my smoothest, easiest pregnancy by far (aside from the false labor scare when Jason was out of town at 38 weeks into my pregnancy with him!). He was also the birth in which labor surprised us the most with its unexpected length, and then as quickly the brevity of the final stages of labor. Additionally, he has been our most challenging baby, without question.


In his three short years, Ian has taught me more about myself than anyone else has in my lifetime. He has stretched me to the very ends of myself, into utter dependence upon God's provision, strength and guidance. Before Ian came along I thought I had a lot of things figured out, but he has taught me that I really know nothing that I thought I knew--and the humility that comes with that has been such a gift.


From the screaming ball of baby that I came home from the hospital with and rocked through tears each day for most of a year (both his and my own), to the stubborn and charming three-year old that I share my life with today, I cannot imagine who I would be without him. Nor do I want to. Because I need the challenges that he brings in my life. And I love that he can challenge me in ways that I would not choose on my own.


Ian is such a loving little guy. While I wouldn't mind some extra sleep in the morning, I secretly love being greeted by him crawling into my bed at 6am to cuddle and rub my back. He gives the best hugs, and while his speech is often unclear, the unmistakable sound of him whispering, "I love you, Mama!" is the most beautiful music to my ears.


He is passionate about life and there is nothing this boy does that is without mucho gusto! If he's throwing a ball--he'll launch it across the yard. If he's dancing, it's the wildest crazy dance I've seen. If it's building a tower or a train track, it will be the tallest tower or most intricate track possible.


Ian loves books like none other. We find he is often the last of our kids to fall asleep at night. We'll peek in after all is silent for awhile to find him sitting in bed, with a mound of books, reading silently to himself. When it's story time, one or ten is never enough. When he's feeling especially generous, he shares a book with a sister--and you know it's love.


When he lets me, I still love to sneak in a moment to rock with him and stroke his little white, fuzzy head and whisper to him that he is my favorite little boy. And if I ask him who my favorite little boy is, the way that he beams when he replies, "Ian!" is just the best.


May you always stretch me and challenge me, but keep your sweet and gentle, yet passionate and strong-willed spirit, my son. I cannot wait to see the man that you grow into. You were named for two of my favorite men who possess some of these very traits--and I love your Daddy and loved your Grandpa Highley very much because of these traits. May God give your Dad and me the wisdom and stamina to harness your energy and direct it in a way that will serve you well, and serve those around you well.


I love you, Ian. You will always be my favorite little boy.

Ian Alan--age 3